[livejournal.com profile] fandom_muses: Topic 22 - Religion

May. 24th, 2006 11:44 am
pez_love: (Jarod Pez)
[personal profile] pez_love
While I’m familiar with the dogma and ordinances of most world religions, I’ve never really considered them from a personal perspective outside of my simulations.

But my simulations themselves are an entirely different story.

I’ve experienced religion and faith, or lack thereof, secondhand through my simulations countless times. I’ve felt the peace of men who died knowing they would see their loved ones in Heaven, the righteous conviction of those who were ready to sacrifice everything for their fellow man all because it was what God asked of them.

I’ve felt the rage of those who don’t believe in God, or have faith in anything, much less an omnipotent creator. I’ve felt the fear of those with faith who believe there’s no eternal reward waiting for them, only damnation.

The familial aspect of religion strikes a chord with me...the idea of coming from a single creator, of being spiritual brothers and sisters with all those around me. I understand the nature of religion, and the root of faith. It gives comfort due to the fact it lets you know that no matter who you are or what you do...you’re never truly alone.

I’ve experienced the belief of countless others...but I’ve never had the chance to find my own, and I don’t think I will any time soon.

I think there’s a lot of solace to be found in believing in something greater than myself, believing that I might be able to see my brother again in the hereafter. I wish that very thing for Miss Parker...that one day she can be with her mother again, and with Tom. He made her happy...and he gave her the things she deserved.


The things I never could.


But I can’t put my faith in too much of anything, not yet. I put faith in the Centre, believed in the people there, and in the end it cost me too much to make that mistake ever again.

I’m saving my faith for my father...that I’ll get to see him again. I’m saving it for my mother and for Emily.

When I’m free to live my life like any other person...when I can finally stop running? Maybe I’ll give religion a try then.

Muse: Jarod
Fandom: The Pretender
Words: 375


pez_love: (Default)

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